Jon Lajoie - Everyday Normal Crew(2009)

[00:00.05] Hey yo! Fuck NWA (Get the fuck outta here).
[00:06.40] Fuck G Unit (fuck that shit).
[00:09.12] Fuck D12 (motherfucker!).
[00:10.94] Get the fuck out of the way (fuck you bitch!).
[00:14.57] Normal motherfucking crew (motherfucker!).
[00:16.39] Everyday normal crew (what what what what!).
[00:20.02] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[00:23.65] You can fuck with us 'cause we won't fuck with you.
[00:26.37] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[00:29.09] Once a month we get drunk and watch Terminator 2.
[00:31.82] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[00:34.54] If you're hot bitches we're too shy to talk to you.
[00:37.26] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[00:39.99] And we get joy spending time with our families.
[00:42.71] This is my bro J-A to the S-O-N yo,
[00:46.35] the best at Mike Tyson's Punch Out on Nintendo.
[00:48.17] From Glass Joe to Macho Man, yo he fucks shit up,
[00:50.91] then Tyson goes down with a star upper-cut.
[00:53.66] And he's also pretty good at Super Mario 3,
[00:55.47] but he doesn't use the flutes cause he doesn't like cheats.
[00:59.10] Like the Contra code that he really doesn't like,
[01:01.82] Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right,
[01:03.63] then B, A, B, A, Select, Start you got 30 lives.
[01:06.35] He says that shit's for pussies who don't know how to fight.
[01:09.07] Yo this my man cheese, better known as cheese bread,
[01:11.79] We call him that 'cause every time he gets out of bed
[01:14.51] he puts 5 slices of cheese on 5 slices of bread.
[01:17.25] Microwaves that shit, eats it, then goes back to bed.
[01:20.47] Sleeps 12 hours a day and he doesn't like Asian food.
[01:23.20] That's right bitches, he doesn't like Asian food.
[01:25.92] He doesn't like the taste of soy sauce,
[01:29.56] personally I love that shit but he does not.
[01:31.40] Yo Ben is my friend that owns every DVD
[01:33.21] from Goonies to Time Cop to Beverly Hills Cop 3.
[01:35.93] Dark Knight, First Knight, A Knight's Tale, and Knight Rider,
[01:38.67] He even owns the motherfucking movie Street Fighter.
[01:41.72] I borrow them from him I never pay to rent a movie,
[01:44.46] as long as I take care of the box and don't scratch the DVD,
[01:47.18] cause last week I borrowed City Slickers and it got scratched,
[01:48.99] I was hoping that he wouldn't notice when I brought it back.
[01:51.73] but he did and he was pissed so I apologized to him
[01:54.45] and he forgave me and I asked him if I could borrow the movie Twins.
[01:57.17] He was reluctant to do so, but he knows I love DeVito,
[01:59.89] with Schwarzenegger, that's a motherfucking comedic duo!
[02:03.53] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[02:05.35] we own our tickets to Alanis Morissette in June.
[02:08.07] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[02:10.79] we bust gats and cadillacs in Grand Theft Auto 2.
[02:13.51] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[02:16.24] no party is a party without a Phil Collins too.
[02:19.09] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[02:21.80] And when one of us gets a haircut we make fun of them.
[02:24.52] Yo this is D and he's a big fucking wrestling fan,
[02:26.32] Monday Night Raw, Smackdown, and all the shit from the past.
[02:29.03] Like Macho Man Randy Savage and Hulkamania,
[02:31.75] Every year he travels to attend WrestleMania.
[02:34.47] It may come as no surprise that he's never had sex,
[02:37.18] but it doesn't bother him 'cause he has the internet.
[02:39.91] He jerks off to freaky shit like 2 Girls 1 Cup,
[02:42.63] he's fucked up I tried watching it I fucking threw up.
[02:45.35] This my nigga KC (What the fuck did you just call me?),
[02:48.08] Sorry…I'll say friend.
[02:50.80] This is my friend KC the only black friend in the crew,
[02:53.53] not because we're racist every race is welcome in the group.
[02:56.26] Truthfully he's a friend of a friend I don't know him that well,
[02:58.86] but not because he's black my favorite actors are Denzel…
[03:01.58] and Samuel L. Jackson, I also like Bill Paxton,
[03:04.31] but not because he's white, but because of his acting.
[03:07.05] This is my friend Cleo, she really likes the Beatles,
[03:09.79] her favorite is McCartney and her least favorite is Ringo.
[03:12.51] A year ago I asked her to go on a date with me she said no,
[03:15.25] she said she'd rather just be friends, I started cryin and ran home.
[03:17.07] And since then we rarely make eye contact when we speak,
[03:19.80] which is awkward 'cause we all hang out at least two times a week.
[03:22.52] Finally, I ain't me without my best friend Steve,
[03:25.24] He's got my motherfuckin' back although he's weaker than me.
[03:27.96] He'll probably have a heart attack sometime soon,
[03:30.22] but until then he's my top gun like fucking Tom Cruise.
[03:32.95] Jon Lajoie: Say it
[03:39.71] Steve: Nah
[03:41.53] Jon Lajoie: Say it, c'mon say it.
[03:42.44] Steve: Nah
[03:43.34] Steve: You want some of this bitch?! Money! Have a nice day bitch!
[03:44.24] If you play organized sports say, "Hell yeah."
[03:46.06] If you watch 24 say, "Hell yeah."
[03:46.96] If the only ass you see is in porn say, "Hell yeah."
[03:47.87] If you eat chocolate when you're bored say, "Hell yeah."
[03:49.68] I eat chocolate, a lot…when I'm bored. Um, I should stop though…
[03:54.23] my metabolism is slowing down. I also like pie…cherry…rhubarb.
[04:02.39] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[04:06.02] the joke's getting old I fucking agree with you.
[04:08.75] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[04:11.46] I just repeat the same shit from Normal Guy 1 and 2.
[04:14.19] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[04:16.92] What a twist with this one I rapped about my friends too.
[04:19.64] We just a regular everyday normal crew,
[04:22.37] I think this cow's been milked dry…motherfucker!
[04:47.62] Steve: You want some of this bitch? You'll never get it…it's gonna go right up my
[04:48.52] asshole.
[04:49.26]